Poor in Spirit

The shower was cold, the coffee spilled, no time to eat breakfast, co-worker decided to not show up, can’t afford a snack, pulled into a meeting for something, the something was our fault, cant go back and get sympathy from the co-worker who isn’t there.

Result? The feeling of helplessness.

Our heart is screaming in pain! Our response is the same as last time: to quickly find something thing that we know will get our mind off of it for a few minutes, make us feel a bit better and give us time to think about how all this is our co-workers fault anyway. How can we make sure they feel the pain of it? If only we could get them fired, this wouldn’t happen!

Poor in Spirit is the moment that we recognize that pain, our heart screams then suddenly, somewhere inside of us there is a whisper that says, “there is nothing you can do to fix this or make anything any better.” We close our eyes and instantly, flashing in our mind is the last 10 times we felt this way and what our natural response was every time: to run to the thing that numbs the pain, justify ourselves, be bitter, manipulative and deceitful”.

“Wait, my first response has been sin? Every time?”

Something breaks in us in that instant. This is Poor in Spirit.

 The cubical, the classroom, the bed room, the car is suddenly filled

with the presence of God. We feel His greatness, His holiness, His majesty and that we have nothing to offer in return. Our past numbness, bitterness, manupulation and deceitfulness feel like a weight that pulls our face right to the floor. We see what we have to offer and we mourn because it will never measure up to what He is. Our barrenness has led us to mourning.

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted . . .